Bag a Bug
The word around town and our neighborhood is that Bag a Bug is the way to go if you want to be somewhat protected from those Japanese Beetles. Here’s a little background:
I grew up in the Northwest. We had bugs. I think we had beetles. I know we have Japanese people. But nothing could have prepared me for the bug world out here in Clarksville, Tennessee. There are flying bugs that I swear when they hit you or land on you weigh like a pound.
To keep up with the trend here in the neighborhood (I'm the only one without a Bag a Bug), I decided to purchase the infamous contraption.
I find the spot I want to put the bag up. I then get out the directions because I swear you have to be a rocket scientist to figure it out. Okay, you just have to NOT be blonde. So I unseal the “lure”. It is a very nice smelling “lure” about the size of a quarter. So I’m trying to read the instructions and keeping the lure from falling into the bag. So, needless to say, I’ve already begun the mating ritual because a SWARM of them were all over me. Duh. Note to self: Do not assemble out in the yard!!! You will become the love machine for these beetles. Did I mention they fly at upwards of 50 knots?? So I proceed to run to the deck and into the house when I realize that the door is locked!!! Now, they have invited more friends than were in Heidi Fleiss’ little black book. So I’m running around to the garage with Tucker wondering why his mom is freaking out.
After finally regaining my composure, I finished putting the bag together and brought it outside and ran back in to see how many bugs would actually fly into the bag. Wow. It works great. I just hope I’m not attracting more bugs.
Pleased with my feeble attempt at being a complete, self sufficient homeowner, I go into the front yard to unload my mulch and tons of plants that I am going to landscape our yard with. A beetle completes his mission and flies right into my ear. I freak. He’s gone. Then his buddy comes over. I know I washed my hands, but the smell is still there. Okay. I need to get this stuff unloaded, so I run inside and take a quick shower. Meanwhile, Tucker is out in the backyard trying to engage the bag a bug in a game of tag. Barking and assuming the playful stance with his rear up, he is disappointed when the bag a bug just teases him by blowing in the wind.
I’m out of the shower and into a fresh set of yard work clothes. Okay, I have the kavorka (only Seinfeld lovers will know what that is) and the beetles love me.
Have any of you watched that show “How Clean is your House” with those two ladies that come into the most nasty of homes and turn it into a garden of loveliness? Their favorite cleaning supply is white vinegar. I had some believe it or not. So I showered with vinegar and smelled like an Easter egg factory. Apparently, the beetles don’t celebrate holidays so my smell repelled them.
Conclusions:
Bag a Bug definitely attracts Japanese Beetles and kills them.
Do not assemble outside.
Vinegar works miracles on everything from odor removal to cleaning your coffee pot.
2 comments:
Oh, yuck! I don't think I have encountered a Japanese Beetle (that I know of). I wish we had gotten that on video, you running around the backyard.
When did the vinegar smell go away? That sounds terrible. At least it worked.
So you actually used vinegar in the shower. I wonder if it would keep mosquitoes away too. I remember Japanese beetles when Norma told us her husband was being rushed to hospital as he had one in his ear and it had crawled in too far for her to help get it out!!!!! YUCK!!!!!!
Remember????
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